It’s been a long time since Selena Gomez fans have gotten to see her on tour: Her most recent tour was 2016’s Revival Tour, but Gomez ended up cutting the run short. At the time, she explained that anxiety, panic attacks, and depression are side effects of her then-recently revealed lupus diagnosis and said, “I want to be proactive and focus on maintaining my health and happiness and have decided that the best way forward is to take some time off.”

As for whether Gomez will ever tour again, that is uncertain.

In a new Time interview, Gomez said she’s “50-50” on whether she’ll hit the road in the future, explaining, “Nothing makes me happier than 90 minutes of being with my fans and just celebrating together, [but] it is very emotionally draining for me. And then you realize you’re just surrounded by a bunch of people that you’re paying.”

In that same interview, she also spoke about her pre-Benny Blanco plan to have children, saying, “I was alone for five years, and I got really used to it. A lot of people are afraid of being alone and I probably tortured myself in my head for like two years being alone, and then I kind of accepted it. Then I came up with my plan, which was I was going to adopt at 35 if I had not met anyone.”

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